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Disability Etiquette

Disability Etiquette 
Treating others respect and assisting when needed is in our nature.  However, assuming others want our assistance, even if they appear to be disabled, is not polite.  It is polite, though, to offer.  If they accept, we should find out exactly how we may assist.  

Always talk directly to the disabled and not only to a companion, as it is dismissive behavior. Shake hands, if safe, fist or elbow bump with those we meet is most polite, and the disability doesn't change this fact—even if he/she has a prosthetic hand.  Consider, in all cases, how you would wish to be treated if you had a disability.

The Blind or Visually Impaired

Introduce yourself and anyone else accompanying you, ensuring the person knows you are talking to him.  Don’t yell or raise your voice.  Blindness doesn't imply hearing loss.  

It is not insulting to prevent a possible injury.  Speak up if you see a blind person walking into traffic or into an object.  If known, call him by name, especially when in a crowd.  

Never engage guide dogs.  Don’t pet them or feed them.  When they are working, they are on the job.

When Guiding the Blind

Imagine how frightened you would be if in a dark room and someone grabs you.  With that in mind, verbally offer your arm and never grab him. In detail, describe items you see like large cracks in the ground to the right and that the curb is two steps in front of him.  When finished guiding, inform him of his location.  Ensure he is out of the flow of traffic where he won’t be hurt or bumped.  

Those Who are Deaf or Hard of Hearing

Many, of all ages, are hard-of-hearing and most will lose the quality of our hearing as we age. Thus, we should speak clearly to all.  

If it appears that the would-be-responder seems to be straining to hear you, move to a quieter location.  

With those who are deaf, get his attention by tapping him on the shoulder or waving a hand. Speak directly to the deaf without yelling. Take notes if you don’t know sign language.  Still, the deaf may communicate in other ways, perhaps by using a specialized device.  So, ask the person how he wishes to communicate.  Be observant.    

Speech Impediments

Because it is annoying and impolite to finish a person’s sentences, correct him, or use condescending language, use your utmost patience with those who stutter or have other speech impediments.  Most likely, he knows he is difficult to understand. Ask him to repeat anything you didn’t understand and repeat what you think you have heard.  Listen intently for the person to complete his entire sentence.

There are helpful devices, such as the speech-to-speech relay when using a telephone.  If you are in contact with someone who has difficulty speaking, it may be best to suggest using the service, which is free.  For more information, please visit http://www.fcc.gov/cgb/dro/sts.html    

The Mobility Impaired

Because cane and walker users often have balance issues, do not grab, or attempt to move them as it may frighten them.  Offering your arm is most polite.  Although it is polite to open doors for others, inform the mobility impaired before doing so.  They could reach for the door and fall as it opens.

Do not pat wheelchair users on the head, lean on their chairs, lean over them, or ask them to hold something for you just because they have a chair.  It is condescending.  Do not push the wheelchair—even if the person has accepted your offer for assistance—without instruction.  You could dump them out of the chair or damage it.  

Offer to move items in the path of a wheelchair user.  Moreover, offer to hand out-of-reach items to him.  To save the chaired neck strain, and be on his level, sit when talking to him.  

Final Note

Some of the many types of disabilities are hidden.  For example, those with multiple sclerosis may seem fine one day but require a wheelchair the next.  Minimizing their need for the chair on that day, as if they’re playing the sympathy card, is simply wrong—and vile. Always, in all situations, remember to empathize and ask yourself how you would like to be treated.  

More by Rebecca

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